Confessions of an ENFJ

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What's your Myers-Briggs type indicator? 
Share in the comments section!

This week for one of our professional development requirements in my CSPA program we did a workshop on our Myers-Briggs personality types. For those of you that aren't familiar with Myers-Briggs, it's basically a 100 questions or so test that puts us into 4 different personality categories.

Here's an overview:
Extroverted (high energy, thinks out loud) or Introverted (thinks internally, quiet, reserved)
Sensing (structured, need hands on details) or iNtuitive (big picture, more idealistic)
Thinking (can take emotions out of situations, fair) or Feeling (in tune with human emotions, personal)
Judging (schedules, organization) or Perceiving (spontaneous, free spirited)

So after taking the test I found out that I'm an ENFJ (Extroverted, iNtuitive, Feeler, Judging)
.........................phew, now I understand myself so much more. Let me explain:

I am known to be good friends with introverts
It's funny, I always knew I was extroverted but for some reason I thought I would test as an introvert based on the way I answered some of the questions. I do enjoy my alone time often but I am still highly engaged with others around me. It does say however that E's still need alone time to escape their external worlds every now and then so that makes the most sense. Plus, I'm the type of person that does think out loud, so when posed with a question I'm more likely to respond right away than sit and let it sink in for too too long. Not to mention I do love being super connected with people all the time. Take a look at my Facebook and Twitter and that should explain it enough, hah.

Think BIG picture
In the workshop we were broken up into groups and asked to define TIME. My buddy Marcus and I were in one group and we wrote things like "priceless, never ending, not enough of it, etc." and the other group wrote things like "schedule, clocks, minutes, etc." hahaha it was interesting to see those differences. I definitely see things much more big picture. I remember in Judicial training we played that team building game where you build a structure and have a looker, a runner, a builder, etc. I was the looker and I had to describe it to the runner and at the beginning I said to him "okay let me describe it first, it's a house, with a car, and a chef" yadda yadda as I described the LEGO structure. When we were reflecting he mentioned to me that at first he was annoyed that I wasn't just telling him how to build it but the big picture ended up helping them create the structure better. I do take pride in my intuitive views on the world because I think we need more big picture thinkers to help see a larger scope of our actions.

I may have never held the sign, but I've definitely given my fair share
If you didn't know I was a feeler, I have no idea how you know me. I think out of everything in my personality, it's pretty obvious how much I use my emotions in daily life. Not only am I a cryer of EVERYTHING (especially ASPCA commercials), but I also just use crying to relieve stress and handle issues (though, I wouldn't call it "handling" the issues). Feelers also have a hard time removing themselves from a situation, so when they approach conflict they usually say "If I were them,....." which is often how I feel. It's so hard for me to remove my personal emotions in order to make an objective decision. However, it's not all a negative thing because feelers are also pretty good at sensing other people's emotions. Even if sometimes my feelings take over, I'd rather live with them than without them, that's for sure.

I'd kill to have this in my house.
No, this does not mean I'm a judger, that's what people always assume. Judging is actually talking about your level of spontaneity vs. need for organization. I really wish I were the type of person that could jump in the car and drive somewhere with no purpose whatsoever and just enjoy the ride - I can't. I'm all about schedules and organization and plans. Going on any kind of trips are incredibly stressful because I'm always worrying about what clothes to bring, do I have all my required documents, what are we going to do on this trip, how are we going to get places, and so on and so on. It can be a hindrance but overall I am very comfortable with my organized lifestyle. I absolutely cannot live without my Google Calendar because I literally would forget where I was and whether or not I needed to be there at a certain time. I'm a binders, travel plans, and organization guru, and I won't give it up for anything, except maybe one free afternoon of spontaneous adventures. Just one!

In conclusion:
I'm not 100% married to everything Myers-Briggs has to offer. The most important thing to remember is that these types of personality tools aren't meant to put people into boxes. Some days I am completely introverted in certain situations. Other days I take all the feeling out of a situation and really use my thinking skills instead. The ENFJ profile does sum up in general who I am, but I cannot be defined by a few letters and a 100 question test - neither can anyone else for that matter. However, with all that being said, it's important to know something about your personality and your peers' personalities as well so you can learn to work together. It's always good to know someone's background, ain't no harm in it!

Famous ENFJs:

Abraham Lincoln

Barack Obama

Ronald Reagan
Other famous ENFJs:
Sean Connery
Tommy Lee Jones
Oprah Winfrey
Bob Saget
Johnny Depp
Michael Jordan
Kirstie Alley
Ben Stiller
Peyton Manning
Matthew McConaughey
Ben Affleck
Diane Sawyer
Ross Perot
Abraham Maslow

To learn more about the ENFJ personality type, or any other personality type, click here.

In the spirit of Tacos,

One Angry Taco

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Coming from a family of angry jalapeƱo type people, it's hard to keep those emotions down.

Lately I've been struggling with my anger. I think through the stress of my daily life these days, the added pressure is causing me to me emotionally unstable at times. I feel like I just burst out with anger out of nowhere and it takes quite some time for those fumes to cool off. So I've been thinking about it and I wanted to look more into what Anger really was.

According to Wikipedia:
"Anger is an automatic response to ill treatment. It is the way a person indicates he or she will not tolerate certain types of behaviour. It is a feedback mechanism in which an unpleasant stimulus is met with an unpleasant response." 

Hmm, a "response to ill treatment." That makes sense because that's a huge trigger for me, and usually what results in my anger these days. Lately I've been feeling super defensive about a lot of personal and family issues, and I think that hostility is what has been building up inside of me. So how do I deal with it? Let's turn to Google again.

According to WebMD, I've picked out a few steps that I'm going to try to do more often:

"If you have trouble realizing when you are having angry thoughts, keep a log of when you feel angry."
I've been keeping a tweeting record of my anger spurts, but I think that might be counterproductive. I'm gonna try a notebook or notepad from now on.

"Seek out the support of others. Talk through your feelings and try to work on changing your behaviors."
This is something I've always had trouble with - reaching out to others. I'm going to try not to keep it bottled up inside and trust my friends enough to have conversations with them about what's troubling me.

"Learn how to laugh at yourself and see humor in situations." 
Lately I've been taking things way too personally. While sometimes there are valid reasons for this reaction, I need to not immediately resort to that anger and instead step back and make sure I'm not being irrationally angry.

Lesson of the day: step back, analyze situations in more depth, and laugh a little more than I already do. I'm going to work on it, I'll let you know how it's going [most likely via Twitter, let's be real here].

In the spirit of Tacos,